All day, I’ve been wavering between “rofl, this is going to blow up in the GOP’s face” and “jesus fluffy christ, Roe v. Wade is going to be overturned.”

PS: If Obama chose Hilary as his VP, I wonder who McCain would’ve gone with.

PPS: Biden must be just salivating for the debates to start.  He’s either going to make her look like a tool or himself a misogynist/bully.  I have little faith in Biden’s ability to shut up at the right time.

PPS: I love Samantha “The Love Pita” Bee.

PPPS: And her daughter is JAMIE-LYNN SPEARS, Y’ALL.

Another confession: I’ve been wearing the wrong bra size.  I know it’s been oprah-ed to death (over (enter startlingly high percentage) of women are wearing the wrong size!), but yeesh.

I don’t feel dumb that I’ve been wearing the wrong size, but I feel really dumb about how wrong I was (Band? WRONG!  Cup?  WRONG!).  I mean, they’re MINE.  I should know how big they are.

Saving graces: 1) I hadn’t invested much in undergarments, 2) the size is ‘nicer,’ and 3) the tits are no longer bff with the navel (not that I have National Geographic tits, but now THEY DEFY THE LAWS OF GRAVITY… kind of).

Photo: US Presswire/Gary A. Vasquez

PS: In retrospect, I shouldn’t have paired a photo of Juan Pierre with a post on my chest.

If I hear any variation of “reaching across the aisle” when it comes to (bi)partisan politics, I’m going to club someone with my Nalgene bottle.

EDIT*: When I was walking to the parking lot, a small lizard scampered across my foot.  Too bad I was wearing flip flops.

* was too short to warrant a new post, and could very easily fall under the same title.

EDIT: PHALLUS IT IS NOT! Perhaps this WAS worth £14K (Thanks, LK).

Meh, I don’t think it looks particularly phallic, but people seem to see penises everywhere.

Excerpts:

It cost £14,000 to create, but clearly no-one at the smart London design outfit that came up with the new logo for HM Treasury thought to turn it on its side.

The logo, for the Office of Government Commerce, was intended to signify a bold commitment to the body’s aim of “improving value for money by driving up standards and capability in procurement.”

Instead, it has generated howls of mirth and what is likely to be a barrage of teasing emails from mandarins in other departments.

According to insiders, the graphic was already proudly etched on mousemats [BS note: mousemats. Heh.] and pens before it was unveiled for employees, who spotted the clanger within seconds.

Staff have apparently now stripped their office of souvenirs bearing the logo, which could appear on eBay within days.

A spokesman for OGC said: “It is true that it caused a few titters among some staff when viewed on its side, but on consideration we concluded that the effect was generic to the particular combination of the letters OGC – and it is not inappropriate to an organisation that’s looking to have a firm grip on Government spend.”

Emphasis mine.

Source: The Telegraph (UK)

Man jailed after punching police horse’s ass.

“Carl Coward was charged with battery of a law enforcement animal and is being held at the Orient Road Jail on $500 bond, jail records show.

“The report does not indicate whether the horse suffered any serious injury.”

If only if it were a donkey! So close.

Source: Tampa Bay Online
Photo: ICHC

Lauren’s PMS post (that pic is awesome, btw), reminded me. No, that’s lying, actually. Her post happened to coincide¹ with my wonky cycle, and my ill-fitting clothing reminded me:

What’s muy unfortunate is that while insurgent clodhopper-wearing hormones do a little jig on your brain, you also retain water. So not only are you pissed, irrational, cramping, constantly leaking, and craving deep-fried chocolate dipped jalapeños, you’re also temporarily fat.

This is when I’m convinced that whoever made people out of divine dough is a misogynist.

¹ COINCIDENCE != IRONY. Some people will never understand, and I shall light a candle for your poor, obtuse² souls.

² The word obtuse shall forever be linked to ‘The Shawshank Redemption’… “How can you be so obtuse?” *Andy Dufresne stares, dumbstruck yet innocently, unaware of the degree of the short, fat bespectacled warden’s insecurity, as well as the metaphorical buttfuckery³ that will follow*

³ The most popular definition of buttfuck in the urban dictionary: “what happens to you when you use AOL.” Can’t say I disagree.

Otherwise, what’s the point? Am I supposed to be aroused or terrified?

I hope these aren’t going to be as persistent as the dancing people ads.

squishy : ICHC comments :: epileptic : strobe lights

One example below. I love me some ICHC, but lord have mercy.

“Wenz Windo sillz goez
bad Kittehz fyndz demsellvz inz
awdd preedikkamentz

Mebbee Windo Sill
didn’tz lyke t3h way Kitteh
strrrretchd andz lawst ballenss?

Oarz Windo Sill may
habz thawt Kitteh wuz hawgginn’
awll teh wawrm sun beemz?

Eevurr way, Kitteh
shoodz beez luukeeng pannikkd, yet
seemz plassiddlee cawllm

Kitteh awllwayz habz
t3h lasst laff wenz it cumz 2
grabbitte’z flawwd lawz”