May 22, 2008

ding! recharge complete!

Posted in compulsive listmaking at 10:45 am by squishy

Excerpted from the tome, “Things I don’t like”:

– the smell of cut grass. Aside from the obvious offenders (sulfur, pungent BO, dung etc.), this odor is the most effective in forcing me to mouth-breathe. Back in the 90s when Gap was coming out with their line of perfume, I semi-yakked when I had a whiff of their Grass EDP.  I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

– thongs. They are uncomfortable and inherently unhygienic. There’s a small changing room/nook in our public bathroom, and I found a WORN THONG in there. Like, OBVIOUSLY WORN.

Boyshorts, please.

– people who refer to flip flops as thongs.

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9 Comments »

  1. Tina said,

    Agreed and agreed. Except the part about cut grass. It just makes me sneeze, not yak. Oh and the part about boyshorts. I’ll add those to my list of hates. So um, sorta agreed and agreed.

  2. oh noes! I disagree on both counts! The smell of fresh cut grass is like crack to me… and as long as you find thongs on the g-string side of the equation, without too much fabric wadding up in there, I think they’re totally comfy. It sounds like your Bathroom Thong Wearer had a little ass blowout party, or at the very least a shart, and that kind of situation is going to make anybody’s life a little unhygienic no matter what kind of underwear they have on. But in that case the problem is with the sphincter, not the thong.

  3. squishy said,

    I might just have a wonky bum and/or olfactory cells.

    NF, with the aerodynamics and projectile motion involved, you could easily get government funding for that kind of study.

  4. Lindsey said,

    Oh, NF, I was drinking tea while I was reading your comment and almost had it come out my nose!

    I agree w/ you squishy about the grass scent. I HATED that Gap perfume! Awful! As I’ve grown up, I’ve started hating the smell less and I’ve actually found myself liking it.

    As far as thongs go, I’m okay with them, except for at the gym. Doing a yoga class or a cycling class in a thong can bring one to tears, I’m afraid.

    And flip flops are flip flops; never thongs.

  5. lk said,

    I disagree with all but the last.

    Which also reminds meof a story. I went to catholic high school. We didn’t have uniforms, but we did have a really strict dress code. Anyway, one week we were goign to have a “dress down” day on Friday so the principal came over the loudspeaker to remind us of what was and wasn’t appropriate even when we coudl dress down. And yeah… he was like “no thongs, etc, etc, etc.” Yeah, the entire room full of people pretty much either turned beet red or bust out laughing.

  6. boobaby said,

    I owned and loved Gap’s Grass perfume. I rarely smell cut grass anymore. The soil of Chicago doesn’t seem grass friendly – it’s really sandy. It could be because the area I live in was once Lake Michigan.

  7. Anonymous said,

    you have permanently ruined my image of women

  8. Kelly said,

    1) Fresh cut grass smells like spring, so I think either you hate warm weather or your nose is broken. Either way, I’m sorry to report that something is wrong with you
    2) I do not like thongs. I wish lingerie companies would quit trying to force them on me by making them the only matchable option to my bras. I wear them in two occasions: when they will be off very quickly (*ahem*) or when I absolutely, absolutely must. In which case, I splurge on these $25 thongs that feel like they aren’t even on. But I still dislike them. I will refrain from buying a skirt or pants that requires a thong just to avoid wearing one.
    3) yes. That is ridiculous.

  9. Unscrupulous said,

    Somehow i missed the point. Probably lost in translation 🙂 Anyway … nice blog to visit.

    cheers, Unscrupulous!!!


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