August 29, 2008

i call it palin-induced bipolar disorder

Posted in wtf? at 5:34 pm by squishy

All day, I’ve been wavering between “rofl, this is going to blow up in the GOP’s face” and “jesus fluffy christ, Roe v. Wade is going to be overturned.”

PS: If Obama chose Hilary as his VP, I wonder who McCain would’ve gone with.

PPS: Biden must be just salivating for the debates to start.  He’s either going to make her look like a tool or himself a misogynist/bully.  I have little faith in Biden’s ability to shut up at the right time.

PPS: I love Samantha “The Love Pita” Bee.

PPPS: And her daughter is JAMIE-LYNN SPEARS, Y’ALL.


August 28, 2008


Posted in miscellany at 10:20 pm by squishy

Not as powerful as 2004, but that’s probably due to the element of surprise (and lack thereof tonight); plus the bar is set pretty durn high when it comes to Mr. Obama and public speaking.  Good job all around, but I was already going to vote for him anyway, as is the majority of California.  I hope the folks in Pennsylvania, Ohio, Florida, Michigan and Virginia were paying attention.

If you haven’t checked it out already, I recommend giving FiveThirtyEight a click. It primarily deals with the polling/statistical side of elections, and it appeals to the numbers geek in me.

PS: Want to get pissed off in 7 seconds flat? Read the comments following the articles.  Some steaming nuggets of shit:

“[Obama] is the reincarnation of Jim Jones. Just shows Americans are lemmings and can be easily led down the path of their own destruction”

“Even Hitler gave a good speech” — which actually got deleted by the mods a few seconds after I copy-pasted.  Actually, a bunch just got deleted before I got a chance to copy them down.  One of them called him a “closet Muslim.”

Photo: NYT/Damon Winter


August 27, 2008

despite my flawless feedback (which i’m mighty proud of), i might have to open a new account

Posted in asshat!, miscellany at 12:12 am by squishy

It turns out that I’m a much more prolific time-wasting nutbag of a compulsive typer* when I have a real job**.

So, main topic.  Someone I went on one date with found out what my eBay user name is.  I don’t know how or why, but he found out, and looked up the shit I bought in the past month or so (or however long it is before eBay stops linking to your past purchases).  Unfortunately, I recently won a few bra auctions since all my old bras are the wrong fucking size, so he could see what kind/size of undergarments I got.  He was classy enough to mention this in one of the creepiest e-mails ever.

As you can surmise, there was an excellent reason why there wasn’t a second date.  I’m only embarrassed I acquiesced to go on that first date at all.


I also want to mention that ever since getting a new iMac, I have been crashing it twice a week.  Clockwork.  I think I’ve cross-contaminated it with my disease-addled PCs.  A lot of things I touch turn to shite.

* I’m trying my best not to refer myself as one who blogs, let alone a blogger.  I still can’t explain my aversion to that word; then again, very few of my aversions are explainable.  Or rational, for that matter.

** Although I did start a small business with my pop, which is GNAWING AWAY AT THE FIBER OF MY BEING to the point that said small business would have no regularity problems in the off chance it had a gastrointestinal tract.  Graduate school will feel like a vacation in comparison.

Photo: long time no ICHC

August 19, 2008


Posted in miscellany at 12:31 am by squishy

I quit my job, decompressed and enjoyed my time off.  I did nothing yet managed to waste plenty of money. The hours of sleep have increased, hours listening to NPR have decreased, and I have yet to go to a day game. Sunday would’ve been a good one. Walkoff hits are always nice, especially if it’s a hot player. Andre could stand to get a haircut, though.

Anyway, since I’ve last posted, Manny Ramírez was traded to the Dodgers and hit a bit, John Edwards admitted to an affair and may have even fathered a bastard kid, Dubya patted Misty May-Treanor’s upper ass, some dude with huge hands, feet, ears and short legs won a lot of medals, Pervez Musharraf resigned and Greg Maddux has been traded for.  Again.

It’ll take me a while to get back into the clichéd swing of things*. I mean, I almost forgot how to type.

* Among my long list of hated things, clichés are one of them. I couldn’t think of a better phrase, so I acknowledged the clichédness of the damn thing by prefacing it with “clichéd” but I still feel like a thoroughly unoriginal cheeseball for even typing that shit out. I’m open to suggestions, at which point I’ll delete it and pretend this never happened.